Sri Camatkara Chandrika

(A Moonbeam of Sheer Astonishment)

by Srila Visvanatha Cakravarti Thakura 

FIRST PRANK - THE MEETING IN THE BOX

.... One day....at Nandagram....in the morning, Sri Yashoda is placing some very nice enjoyable things within a large wooden box. As she is packing the box with different kinds of clothing and ornaments, Sri Krishna happens to come along and begins to question her.

He asks, “My dear mother! What are you doing at this time of the morning?”

Yashoda replies, “My dear Son! I am filling up this box.”

Sri Krishna: “What is it that you are keeping  so carefully within the box?”

Yashoda: “My Son! Why do You need to know? Just go outside now and play with Your boyfriends.”

Sri Krishna: “I really want to know what you are doing! If you don’t tell me, then I will not leave this room!”

Yashoda: “Within this box, I am putting sandalwood sticks, jewelled pollen of the camphor lotus, musk, and red kunkum powder for making nice scented body-ointments. And for making different kinds of dresses, I am packing extremely valuable cloth, waist ornaments made of tiny tinkling bells, earrings, bangles, uncommonly rare lapis-lazuli gems, emeralds and pearls.”

Sri Krishna: “All these things you are packing in the box....are they for me? Or are they meant for my Brother Balarama?”

Yashoda: “My delightful Son! I will tell You, if You will listen. There is another box that I have already prepared for You, and it is much bigger than this one. It is filled with very valuable jewels and cloth. I have also prepared a similar one for your Brother Balarama.”

Sri Krishna: " If you are not preparing this new box for Me or for My older Brother, then who are you preparing it for, anyway? Who is such a dear object of your affection.”

Yashoda: “Hey Vatsa! Hey Vrajapuralankara, The decorative ornament of Vraja-pura! Hey Putra!  Just as Providence has bestowed You upon me as a result of my meritorious austerities performed in the past, in the same way, there is one daughter here in Gokula Who is like the medicine that sustains my very life. She is just like soothing camphor for my otherwise burning eyes. It is Her clothing and ornaments that I am keeping in this box.  Hey Vatsa!  The Creator has made many different feminine qualities such as beauty, good behavior, simplicity, humility and so on.  But there is one girl who is such that when all those good qualities take shelter of Her, then only can they become great.  Usually, if ordinary girls take shelter of such feminine qualities, then the girls become great.  But there is one girl who is so wonderful, that when all those good womanly qualities take shelter of Her, then the qualities themselves thereby become truly glorious!  This is most amazing!  This girl’s name is SRI RADHA, and it is for Her that I have natural love and affection.”

As soon as Sri Krishna hears Sri Radha’s divine name and qualities being described by His mother’s own mouth, His entire body erupts in bumps of ecstatic delight, which He immediately covers up with His cloth.  Then, filled with incredibly intense enthusiasm, He again questions mother Yashoda.

Sri Krishna:  “He Janani!  Who is this girl?  Whose daughter is She, and where does She live?  How is it that you have such intense love and affection for Her?  Kindly explain everything to Me.”

Yashoda:  “Hey Vatsa!  Listen!  From the jewel-mine of My sakhi Kirtida’s womb has arisen a sinless, matchless jewel of a daughter.  By the shimmering waves of this jewel’s aura, She is illuminating Vrisabhanu.  Usually, the sun makes ordinary jewels shine brightly, but this daughter-jewel of Maharaja Vrisabhanu is so effulgent that Her aura makes even the brightest summer sun perk up and shine still more brightly. (vrsa=the hottest summer month of jyestha; bhanu=sun).

This girl is verily the personified austerities of King Versa, and She lives at the palace that he made for Her at Yavat, along with Her husband, Abhimanyu.  But just now, Her husband has arrived here at our home in Nandagram.  He is outside with Gostha-raja, the king of the pasture land, Nanda Maharaja, tending to some household affairs.  When Abhimanyu comes to this inner chamber to see me before leaving, then I will tell him in sweet words,
‘Hey Abhimanyu!  Please take this box yourself and, carrying it back to your home, kindly offer it to Sri Radha’.

While Yashoda is thus conversing with Sri Krishna, a dasi named Lavanga- latika comes into the room.  Approaching Mother Yashoda, she announces,
“Hey Queen of the pasture lands!  Those two goldsmiths named Rangana and Tankana, whom you have called for, have just arrived outside.”

Hearing this, the lovely-faced Sumukhi Yashoda then says to the girl Dhanistha, 
“Hey Dhanistha!  I am going outside now in order to arrange for the manufacture of Krishna’s ornaments like crowns, earrings and bracelets.  You just stay here and keep an eye on this box.”

Saying this, Vrajesvari then leaves the room.

Just then, Sri Krishna’s dearest, most confidential cowherd boyfriends headed by Subala Sakha arrive on the scene.  In the topmost bliss, Krishna has a little discussion with them.  Then, taking the box to a solitary place, they open it up.  Taking out all the clothing and ornaments and entrusting it all in Dhanistha’s hands, Krishna then climbs into the box.  Subala and the other boys close the lid and place the box just as it was before.

After a little while, Sri Vrajesvari returns.  Then Abhimanyu comes in to offer his respects to Yashoda before he returns home to Yavat.  Seeing Abhimanyu bowing down, Sri Yashoda inquires of his welfare, and then instructs him,
“Hey Abhimanyu!  I have prepared a box full of jewelled ornaments for your wife.  It contains many riches like spotless gemstones and gold necklaces, many different types of cloth, as well as various ointments like musk, camphor and so on.  So many nice things are packed in different layers.  I want you to personally take this box and offer it to Sri Radhika, because I don’t trust anyone else to do it responsibly.  Present it to Her in a solitary place, and relay to Her this message of mine---

sandestavya tvayi madaksi-sukhade! sri kirtida-kirtide!radhe! presita- petikantara gaten atyujjvala jyotisatvad gatrocita mandanena nitaram tvad vallabhena sphutamtvam srngaravati sada bhava ciranjiveti sambhogyatah

‘Oh You Who give pleasure to my eyes! Oh You Who bestow fame and glory upon Kirtida! Oh Radhe!  Within this box, I have sent You an extremely brilliant aura.  It consists of ornaments just befitting Your body, and I am sure that You will cherish them to the utmost.  By all of these dear things, may You become radiantly decorated every day.  Thus achieving great fortune and happiness, may You become enthused with newer life forever and ever.’

Hearing this from Yashoda, Abhimanyu replies, 
“Oh Vrajesvari!  As you have ordered me, I will faithfully carry it out.”

Saying this, he lifts the box up onto his head and starts for home in a loving mood.

Sri Krishna-candra, being carried upon Abhimanyu’s head, thus travels on for a rendezvous with Abhimanyu’s own Wife----and His own Priya Radhika.  Thus throwing Himself into an ocean of novel prankish fun, He breaks into a sweet, mischievous grin within the box.

That foolish, dull-brained cowherd boy Abhimanyu then begins to think to himself,  “Today I have really become rich---I have now become successful and fortunate.  Judging by the weight of this box, I can just imagine how many heaps of pure gold must be packed inside.  With all this wealth, I will purchase millions of cows.  Thus, just like my friend Govardhana Malla, I will have the Goddess of Fortune fixed permanently in my very own home.”  

Thinking like this again and again while traveling with the box on his head from Nandagram, Abhimanyu arrives before his own home at Yavat with his entire body studded with bumps of joy and his eyes brimming with tears of loving bliss.  Thus, feeling such great happiness, he could not perceive even for a second the fatigue of carrying such a load upon his head.  The reason for this is----would anyone feel any difficulty carrying such a divine object composed of thickly condensed, absolutely complete ecstatic bliss such as Sri Krishna???

Going into his home, Abhimanyu addresses his mother, Jatila, “Hey Mata!  Today I must have left the house at an auspicious moment, for I have been blessed with the fortune of obtaining this box full of gold, jewels, ornaments and cloth.  Hey Janani!  Sri Vrajesvari has sent some matchless gifts for your Daughter-in-law, Sri Radhika, and she has sent this message for Her as well:

sandestavya tvayi madaksi-sukhade! Sri Kirtida-kirtide!radhe! presita- petikantara gaten atyujjvala jyotisatvad gatrocita mandanena nitaram tvad vallabhena sphutamtvam srngaravati sada bhava ciranjiveti sambhogyatah

‘Oh You Who gives pleasure to my eyes!  Oh You Who bestow fame and glory upon Kirtida! Oh Radhe!  Within this box, I have sent You an extremely brilliant aura.  It consists of ornaments just befitting Your body, and I am sure that you will cherish them to the utmost.  By all of these dear things, may You become radiantly decorated day after day; thus achieving great fortune and happiness, may You become enthused with newer life forever and ever.’

Hearing all this, the old woman Jatila becomes blissfully overwhelmed, and begins to think to herself, “Today, by the power of great Fortune, a wonderful thing has happened.  Obtaining such a matchless gift today, my Daughter-in-law will now become very pleased with my son Abhimanyu......”

Then Jatila openly laughs and laughs and says,"Hey Putra!  This box is so heavy that even myself, your Wife and your sister Kutila together could not possibly lift it; therefore, you kindly lift it and bring it into Vrisabhanu-nandini’s bedroom, placing it upon the raised platform there.  Once it is there, then She can quickly and easily open it up and see all of the wonderful gifts and dearmost ornaments inside.”

Following the order of his mother, Abhimanyu then carries the box towards Sri Radhika’s bedroom.

Seeing the large box upon Abhimanyu’s head as he carries it in, Lalita and all the other sakhis and dasis perk up and feel supreme bliss.  Sri Radhika’s left eyelid, arm, breast and thigh began to vibrate and twitch.  Because of that, Sri Radha gleefully addresses Lalita,
“Hey Sakhi!  This abode of My mother-in-law is completely pervaded only with the most depressing, miserable suffering---so how is it that My left eyelid, arm, breast and thigh are suddenly dancing without any reason?  It seems as if there is no possibility whatsoever of observing such an auspicious sign here, what to speak of obtaining the benediction of such a sign come true as long as I am trapped here in this horrible place.”

Lalita replies, “Sri Radhe!  I can only guess that within this box is a most fascinating Manohara-ornament   (1. ornaments made of the best of fascinating jewels, or 2. Manohara, the mind-enchanting Sri Krishna).  Your limbs twitched as an auspicious indication of obtaining such a rare gift.  Hey Sakhi!  This type of twitching is only indicative of obtaining the absolute zenith of good fortune!”

Sri Radhika says, “Hey Lalita!  Just by seeing this box, My mind has become surcharged with an indescribable ecstatic mood----I can’t even begin to try and put into word!  Opening up the box that has just come into My own home, I will now see what jewelled ornament is inside that will bestow such a great fortune upon Me.”

As Srimati Radharani and Sri Lalita Sakhi are thus conversing with one another, Abhimanyu brings the box in, places it upon the raised platform just before Her bed, and then leaves.

Thereafter, all the sakhis, wondering “What’s inside the box?  What’s inside the box?” completely surround the box in the most extremely eager curiosity as Sri Radhika Herself leaves Her other ornaments aside and quickly begins to open it.  The very second She opens the lid, Sri Krishna-candra suddenly springs out of the box and stands upright.

Seeing Him there instead of valuable clothing, ornaments and cosmetics, all the sakhis who are surrounding the box exclaim, “AHAHA!!!  O MY GOODNESS!!!!  WHAT’S THIS?!?!?!” as they clap their hands, laughing and giggling.

The crocodile-like mood of Cupid’s invisible presence within the room suddenly manifests and begins to swallow up the bodily limbs of the sakhis, who are not fully covered with cloth in the privacy of Sri Radha’s bedroom.  The dasis, who were lying about resting, then get up very quickly in shy embarrassment.  Topmost divine bliss flows in hundreds and thousands of churning waves, which swell and flourish about the room.

As for Kala-nidhi Sri Krishna, the abode of all artistries, He feels fully satisfied in His own prestige.  Exhibiting majestic motions of such a mild and soft gently manner, He kisses all of the gopis’ faces simultaneously.

After that, Lalita Sakhi says to Sri Radhika, “Hey Radhe!  That ‘decoration’ that has come is indeed glorious!;  Your husband who brought it is also glorious; Gostha-mahesvari who sent it is also glorious; and her message to You ‘Hey Radhe! May You become decorated by that which I am sending” is also glorious; and this house, the place where this box is sporting, is also glorious!  Hey Ali! My dear Friend!  Sri Radhe!  You have been ordered by Sri Gosthesvari ‘You should become decorated by that which I have sent’.  That order was also repeated by Your husband and Your mother-in-law.  Therefore hey Gandharvike!  Following the order of Your three superiors, proclaim Your own ideal behavior to the world by such practice of righteous etiquette.  In other words, just become decorated with the jewelled ornament that was sent in the box and thus duly honor the order of Your three superiors.”

Hearing these words of Lalita, Srimati Radhika becomes very embarrassed, and She blushes in meek shyness. 

A moment later, She smiles lightly and says, “My dear Lalita! A rascal thief has stolen all the clothes and ornaments that were given Me by Yashoda Mayi. Taking them out of the box, He has kept them in some other place while keeping Himself hidden within. Go right now and explain all this to My mother-in-law Jatila, and quickly bring her here.”

Then Lalita says to Sri Krishna, “Oh clandestine rendezvous-lover of Radha! Rascal carried by Abhimanyu! You rode on Abhimanyu’s head in order to rendezvous with his own wife, Sri Radhika! By doing this, are You desirous of seeing the earth become completely bereft of all chaste women? Well, all right, what’s done is done - but now You should immediately return all the cloth and jewels that you stole from inside the box; if not, then by bringing Jatila here, I will expose the real truth of Your fame and glory.”

Hearing this, Sri Krishna then says, “Oh my dear Lalita! Your friend Radharani is very crooked, and She is extremely skilled in serving Her own selfish purposes.  I entered this box while playing at home, and your Sakhi sends Her husband to forcibly carry away Me and the box, bringing Me here just to be framed with this bogus accusation!”

Then, laughing and laughing, He says to Sri Radhika, “Hey Radhe!  I became fascinated by smelling the natural wooden fragrance of this box; sending all of the items it contained to You via Dhanistha, I then climbed into the box just to make Myself nicely scented.  Right at that moment, Your husband happened to come along by chance and brought Me here.”

After saying this to Sri Radhika, He says to all the sakhis, “Hey assembly of sakhis!  I now place the topic of this accusation before you all.  Just think it over carefully and then decide---- if Sri Radhika is at fault, then I will rightfully punish Her; or, if I’m at fault, then I will allow Myself to be tied up in the binding-noose of each and everyone of your arms. In this way I will voluntarily spend three nights of miserable imprisonment here...”

		                             	*  *  *  *  *  *  *  *

yasyaivam vibhavena tan-nava-yuva-dvandvam sphurat-yauvanam
sakhyastaksi cakorikam sara-tatim kamo rasah svaditam
dhyanam bhakta-tati sada kavi-kulam sviya vicitra girah
kirtim dsma bhuvanesu sadhu saphali-cakre numastam param

That fresh young Couple
	                                  radiating splendrous eternal agelessness
By this sort of wonderful influence-
Who has made fully-blossomed Fame
                                          	spread throughout all the world.
in the most boldly fulfilling way

----By the cakori-like eyes of the sakhis,
----By the piercing love-arrows of Kama,
----By the tasting of divine rasa,            
----By the meditations of the devotees,     
----By the variegated statements of the poets

I offer my must humble, prostrated glorification of Their Divine Lordships

THUS ENDS THE FIRST PRANK OF SRI CAMATKARA-CANDRIKA, 
ENTITLED MANJUSIKA-MILANA (The Meeting in the Box)

SECOND PRANK:  ABHIMANYU VESE MILANA 

(Meeting in the Disguise of Abhimanyu)

Once,  in  the  cold  month of Magh (January-February), Sri Radhika  began to follow an auspicious vow of bathing daily in the Yamuna River early in the morning. thus, every day just before dawn, She rose from bed and went with her girlfriends to bathe in the Yamuna. Seeing this going on, Kutila (the sister of Abhimanyu) began to develop a suspicion within her mind.

One day, just after Sri Radhika leaves with Her friends at the end of night to go to the Yamuna, Kutila makes some excuse to go to the home of Sri Krishna at Nanda-gram. She wants to check up and see what Sri Krishna is doing at that time of the morning. Arriving at the palace, she asks some resident for the latest news about Sri Krishna. The resident of Nanda-gram replies, “Our youthful Prince of the pastures has just gone to the Yamuna for a morning bath, following the order of His Mother.”

Hearing this, the doubt within Kutila’s heart simply increases. Therefore she immediately leaves for the bank of the river. Not knowing exactly which direction that Sri Krishna had gone in for enjoying sweet, relishable pastimes with Sri Radha, Kutila begins to trace out His path by following the trail of His extraordinary divine footprints, which are always clearly visible in the soft earth of Vraja- dhama. Gradually she comes just before the forest bower-house within which Sri Krishna is enjoying with Srimati Radharani.  

Seeing Kutila coming closer and closer, Sri Radha’s dear maidservant named Tulasi fearfully enters into the bower-----and sees that Sri Radha is deeply immersed in joyful pastimes of jokes and laughter along with Her Beloved, completely surrounded by Lalita and all the assembly of sakhis.  It seems as if They are attaining boundless supreme bliss.

So Tulasi Dasi, becoming extremely blissful just to see Them enjoying in this ecstatic way, suddenly exclaims “Bho, bho Vraja-devis!  Please hear this message which simply announces the greatest misfortune for the festival of the Flower Archer (Cupid) today!  Kutila has come from Vraja to spy on Sri Krishna and witness this festival; slowly but surely, she is gradually approaching this very spot!!!”

Immediately upon hearing this, the entire assembly of sakhis loudly exclaims,
	WHERE?  WHERE?? ALAS!!! TELL US!!!"
as they all begin to look this way and that with fearful, restless eyes.

Tulasi says, “Seeing her just in front of the Chattikara forest, I have rushed here as fast as possible!  By now, Kutila must be right in front of this place!”

Hearing all this, Sri Krishna calmly says, “Hey gopis!  Don’t you worry at all---just wait here for a minute and see what will happen next;  I’m leaving here now, and I will don the disguise of Abhimanyu.  Thus I will cheat Kutila with My tricks of sheer genius---and moreover, I will take the fun from there and execute even more mischievous pranks.....”

Saying this much, He goes to a lonely place.  Taking clothing and ornaments suitable for copying Abhimanyu’s mode of dress from Vanadevi Vrinda, He covers up all of His own distinguishing features.  Then, He begins to walk down the same path as that on which Kutila was searching.

Aho!!! Is a clever person, highly advanced in arts of craftsmanship and taste, ever unable to serve his own purposes with great skill???

After walking for a short distance, Sri Krishna then meets up with Kutila.  Kala-nidhi Nagara, the Lover of women, Who is the Abode of tasteful Artistries, then begins to question her.  Making His voice just like Abhimanyu’s, He asks,“Hey sister Kutila!  Why have you come so far away from Vraja so early in the morning?”

Kutila: “Hey Agraja!  Older brother!  I’ve come to search out your wife.”

Sri Krishna: “Where has She gone?”

Kutila: “Coming out this way on the plea of observing a vow to bathe every morning in the Yamuna during this cold season, She must be somewhere close by here.”

Sri Krishna: “Where is that woman-thief, Sri Krishna?”

Kutila: “He has also come this way for bathing; for this reason, our mother Jatila has sent me to find out what They’re up to.  Now, what should I do?  Please order me.”

Sri Krishna:  “Hey sister!  Today I was hitching up one of My young bulls to the plow for training.  Suddenly, he broke the plow and ran off somewhere.  I have come this way while searching for that young bull, and now it seems as if I have lost him.  This troubles My heart somewhat, but in comparison I am just unable to tolerate the agitating anxiety that I feel over the sheer debauchery caused by that woman- thief towards My Wife.  From here, I’m going straight to Mathura right now, and I will see to it that the befitting measures are taken by King Kamsa.”

“Hey most intelligent sister!  Buddhi-mati!  Before I go, just listen to one plan:  I’ll hide right here in this grove, and you go and look all around for Sri Radhika; if you find Her alone, without Sri Krishna, then just bring Her here by making up some excuse.  Or, if you catch Her with Krishna, then come here and get Me, and I will observe from a distance Their vulgar activities.”

Hearing these instructions, the extremely crooked-natured Kutila then begins to search each and every bower from Kaliya-hrad on up to Kesi- ghat.  Coming before a flower-garden just by the side of Kesi-ghat, she suddenly sees that Girl Who emits purely sweet, natural fragrances, She Who is served slowly and majestically by all of Her surrounding sakhis, She Who is the creeper of Divine Fame for Her mother Kirtida---Sri Radhika.

Sri Lalita Devi, seeing Kutila arrive nearby, then asks her,“Hey Kutila!  Have you come to bathe in the Yamuna?”

Kutila: “No.”

Lalita:  “Then what for?”

Kutila:  “I have come just to learn of your activities.”

Lalita:  “Very good.  So learn all that you can.”

Kutila:  “Lalita!  I have already learned all that I have to know!”

Lalita:  “So let us hear what that is from your own mouth.”

Kutila:  “There’s no need for me to say anything more, because the fragrance of Hari at this place tells the whole story!”

Hearing this, Lalita cleverly takes the word ‘hari’ to mean ‘lion’ (a Sanskrit synonym), and replies,     “Kutila!  If you smell the fragrance of a lion, then that means that without a doubt a fearsome lion is hiding somewhere nearby! Oh!  We are just weak, innocent young girls, and we have now become terrified!!  Running away from here this instant, we shall now rush home as fast as possible!!!  You have really done us a great favor today by coming here and warning us of this great danger!!!”

Kutila’s anger is stoked up upon hearing this insulting statement, and she starts burning with rage as she exclaims,     “Ayi!!!  You so-called chaste girls!!!  You broadcast the fame of your family dynasties from forest to forest----do you think that you can then return home so innocently???  First you just open up the door on this kadamba-tree grove right now----I want to see what is inside!”

Lalita simply laughs and laughs and says, “Kutila!  Some demigod of the forest has closed the gateway of his own bower-house with doors made of reeds, and has gone elsewhere.  Therefore it is not proper for us to open the door to this kadamba grove.  Who is such a bold woman who will dare to open the door of some else’s house and willfully accept such a sin upon herself?”

Kutila then speaks with eyes reddened with fury,  “Lalita!  You are in fact just a weak, innocent young girl as you say, and for this reason, you have never entered into another’s house; but you know quite well how to cause others to enter into your own home.  There is a scripture which gives the rules to be followed by a weak, innocent young girl in order to make another weak, innocent young girl enter into her own home----and you have now become self-effulgent as the acarya and teacher of that scripture!”

With this, Kutila quickly storms up to that bower-house and furiously kicks in the door made of reeds and flowers. Rushing inside, she sees Sri Krishna’s broken flower garland and Sri Radhika’s broken pearl necklace scattered upon a flower bed. Grabbing those remnants, she takes them outside and angrily says,   “Lalita!  You all bathe in the Yamuna during this month of Magh according to scriptural rules; you reap the auspicious benefit; by this, you purify your parents and your forefathers; and you also perform Surya-puja every day according to the proper rules on the bank of the Yamuna (the Daughter of the sun); now you can just return home this instant-----tell me what kind of dharma are you actually desirous of performing day and night???  Tell me, my ears are very anxious to hear your explanation!”

Hearing this kind of taunting statement by Kutila, the spotlessly pure-faced Radharani becomes a bit provoked and says, “Kutila!  Why are you so angry for no purpose?  This necklace is not Mine---it belongs to your brother, Abhimanyu.  I swear it.  Just calm down.”

Saying this, Radharani then begins to chastise Kutila with loud, piercing screams while moving Her eyebrows and index finger angrily.

Then, Kutila retreats back to a safe distance, becoming very fearful by seeing Sri Radhika present there with so many daringly outspoken, bold sakhis. Then Kutila calls out, 
“Hey, you unchaste girls! Disgrace of your families! If you don’t feel like going back home, then just stay in this forest and rule your own kingdom - but I’m going right now to show this necklace and garland to my mother and Paurnamasi; thus I will personally see to it that all of you are properly punished.”

Sri Radha says, “Kutila! Wherever your fickle mind goes, you can just run along and follow it madly if you like - but why do you speak such harsh words to us? Just go from house to house to show everyone that necklace and garland - does that scare Me at all? NO - because those things just don’t belong to Me. Don’t waste your time throwing such false accusations upon us.”

Hearing this, Kutila angrily says, “I am going to Vraja.” and storms off hastily.

Then entering the forest, she sneaks slowly and quietly to the secret place where Sri Krishna is hiding in the disguise of Abhimanyu. Coming before Him, she blurts out, “Dear brother! Just look at this! I found Sri Krishna’s broken flower garland and Sri Radhika’s broken pearl necklace upon a bed of sensuous love. I have also seen Radhika and Her girlfriends, but that woman- thief was not present there.” 
Hearing this, the Abhimanyu-disguised Sri Krishna says, “Oh sister!  Very good---you’ve done well.  I’m leaving right now for Mathura, and I will take this necklace and garland and show them to King Kamsa.  But there’s one important thing to consider----it’s not wise to bring this greatly scandalous disgrace upon our own home; therefore, I will use some clever trickery before the assembly of the Yadus, and I will inquire thus of My dear cowherd boyfriend Govardhana Malla, “Hey friend!  That Son of Maharaja Nanda has brought your wife Candravali to a secluded forest bower and forcibly polluted her.  Look---here’s their broken necklace and garland as evidence.’

“After telling him this, I will place these things into his hand and say further, “Mallaraja!  Sakha Govardhana!  Just as Nanda-putra has enacted this outrageous debauchery with your wife Candravali, in the same way I have seen Him displaying similar social atrocities with each and every household---I tell you frankly.  You just go right now and inform King Kamsa of all this.  Have him send 100 foot soldiers and 10 guards on horseback to Nandagram today at noontime; arresting Nanda along with his Son, give them their just reward.’

“Oh sister Kutila!  After I tell all this to Govardhana Malla, I will return home to Yavat just before noon, because I will have to arrange for the honorable reception of the royal guards who will come.  You just go home now, and remain with mother Jatila.  When your Sister-in- law Radhika returns home, don’t say a word to Her about any of this---for if this secret plan is exposed and the word gets out, then Nanda-gopa will be able to escape in time to flee to another state along with his Son.”

Instructing Kutila thus, the Abhimanyu-disguised Sri Krishna then starts walking on the southbound forest path towards Mathura.  Kutila returns home to Yavat, and gradually Sri Radha and Her sakhis all return to their own respective quarters.

Then Krishna waits for 2 or 3 hours, passing the time somewhere in the forest.  Then He returns to Jatila’s home and begins to call out in a loud voice, “Oh mother!  Where are you?  Oh Kutila!  Where are you?  Come quickly and hear the news----I have just returned from informing the King of the situation here; soon 100 footsoldiers and 10 guards on horseback are coming.  But listen---that Debauchee has taken on my mode of dress and is coming to our home!  Coming to know of this, I have returned home in an unnoticed way.  Sister!  Lock the front door and wait with mother upstairs on the veranda, armed with clods of dirt.  Keep on the lookout for that Woman-polluter coming down the path.  Thus, even if he tries to climb the wall, he won’t be able to enter the house.  When you see him, then chastise him immediately with the foulest, harsh language.  Do you realize the simple nature of your Daughter-in-law?  If She were to even smell the bodily fragrance of that woman-thief, then She would become mysteriously compelled to go out of the house.  Therefore, I will stay with Her downstairs and prevent Her from getting out.” 

Saying this, Sri Krishna goes into the lower rooms with Sri Radhika.  A little while later, Abhimanyu comes toward the house on his way home from the cowherd duties he was tending to.  As soon as he comes before his own house, Kutila immediately take up clods of dirt in her hands and screams out from the rooftop balcony:

“Oho!  You are so bold to destroy the righteousness of the chaste girls of Vraja!  And you are also desirous of entering into my brother’s home---Hey you fickle rascal!  You have come before our house, so I will now break your head with these dirt-balls and give you your just reward!  Hearing all about your social atrocities and outlandish debauchery, King Kamsa has become very, very angry and has sent many soldiers to make you and your father happy!  They will arrive here very soon---When they arrest and take both you and your father away to the capital Mathura, clapping you in a jail-cell as tight as a womb, they only will your fickleness cease!”

Observing the strange behavior of his own sister, Abhimanyu becomes very confused and begins to think, “My sister Kutila has been seized by some kind of powerful ghost; I’d better bring a mantrik doctor to exorcise her.”

Resolving thus, he becomes perplexed by various anxieties and goes to the edge of the village to see the exorcist.

---In this way, Sri Krishna then begins to sport many mischievous, novel pranks in Jatila’s own house along with Jatila’s own Daughter-in- law......

He Who has no fruitive gain
	other than sporting with another’s Wife-----
		will such a Sri Krishna
			not be triumphant in His endeavors???

THUS ENDS THE SECOND PRANK OF SRI CAMATKARA CANDRIKA, ENTITLED ABHIMANYU-VESE MILANA

 (Meeting in the Disguise of Abhimanyu)

THIRD PRANK:  VAIDYA VESE MILANA 

(Meeting in the Disguise of a Female Doctor)

  Jatila, becoming aware of Sri Radhika’s loving affection for Sri Krishna by so many obvious symptoms, becomes very disturbed with great anxiety and calls for her own daughter, Kutila.  

Taking Kutila to a secluded place, she says,  “Hey Putri!  My dear daughter!  I am simply unable to protect my daughter-in-law from that Krishna anymore!  Alas, alas!  What should  I do---what should I do?  Vatsa!  Kutila!  I have decided on a remedy; will it be possible for you to assist me?  There must be some way to prevent Radharani from going outside the house.She Who is bitten by the eager glances of that snake-like son of Nanda must be protected by being kept indoors at all times---there is no other remedy.  Therefore you should always be alert to keep Her carefully here.  Don’t let Her go to Pavan Sarovar or to the Yamuna River to bathe.  Prevent Her from going out to Surya-kund for performing Her usual daily worship of the Sun-god.  Thus, there will be no possibility whatsoever of Her meeting with that debaucher.  From now on, you will have to see that She bathes and worships the Sun-god here at home.  And now that we are keeping Radhika here, that rascal debaucher may try to come into our home somehow or other, at any time of day or night.  For this reason, I will personally keep vigil 24 hours a day by the outer gate with a big stick in my hand.”

Hearing all these instructions from her mother, Kutila replies,  “Mata!  It won’t be possible to confine your daughter-in-law at all; and it won’t be possible to protect Her from the hand of Krishna either----for Vrajesvari Yashoda arranges every day to bring Radhika to Nandagram in order to have Her cook the morning meal for Krishna.”

Hearing this, Jatila says,  “Hey Putri!  You just go to see Yashoda right now, and inform her that from now on my daughter-in-law will not leave the house to go anywhere else; Yashoda should simply engage Rohini to cook for her Son.”

Kutila replies, “Mata!  If I tell her that, then Yashoda will surely say to me,  ‘But Durvasa Muni has given an indescribably wonderful benediction to Radhika whereby any foodstuff cooked by Her own hand increases longevity, stimulates growth and destroys all obstacles; this topic is indeed famous all throughout Vrajapur.  My only Son, Sri Krishna-candra, has become freed from many difficulties caused by wicked demons only on the strength of eating the food cooked by Sri Radharani; thus, He is now alive and well.  Therefore please don’t harm us all by causing this impediment to His regular taking of the grains cooked by Radharani’s hand.’

When Yashoda pleads with me like this, then how should I reply?”

Jatila advises, “Hey Putri!  When Vrajesvari says all that to you, then you just tell her, 
“Hey Vrajesvari!  Durvasa certainly gave Sri Radha this wonderful boon; therefore, whoever She touches lives a long life.  Oh Niti- vijna!  Oh knower of all the rules of proper social conduct!  By that very boon, do you call Sri Radha to your house every day just to have Her touch your own son?  And furthermore, it is contrary to the proper rules of etiquette for chaste daughters to cook in another’s home on a daily basis.  Such a black spot against a chaste daughter is certainly talked about throughout all the land.  Therefore, we cannot tolerate any more of this.  Just as you have love and affection for your son, do you think that we don’t have similar love and affection for our daughter-in-law?’

"Tell Yashoda all these things, but if she is still desirous of feeding her son on Radharani’s cooking on a daily basis, then Dhanistha will be sent 3 times a day, every day, and will thus bring sweet balls and other tasty preparations made by Sri Radha.  And if Vrajesvari becomes angry at this arrangement, then we will simply leave her town and move elsewhere just to protect our daughter-in-law from Her son.

After consulting together in this way, Jatila sends Kutila to inform Vrajesvari of the new decision. Thus, the old woman succeeded in confining Sri Radhika to the house.Being restricted in this way, the resultant burning suffering which is felt by Sri Sri Radha-Krishna due to being unable to see each other is so intense, that it could not possibly be described even by the Goddess of speech, Sri Sarasvati herself.

In an effort to cool down the blazingly feverish body of Sri Radha, which is burning furiously in the agonizing fire of separation from Sri Krishna, Her girlfriends make a bed of cool lotus leaves smeared with sandalwood pulp and camphor; but the very instant that Her smoldering love-sick body touches that cooling bed, the bed itself becomes as hot as burning embers.

All this is just indicative of Her unique loving moods of ecstasy, which are such that She considers even an eye-blink to be the cause of separation from seeing Krishna; cursing the Creator, who made such blinking eyes, this Sri Radhika then wishes to be reborn as a fish with no eyelashes.  Indeed, without seeing Nanda-nandana 24 hours a day, how would it be possible for such a Sri Radhika to pass the time?

Thus falling down senseless upon the flower bed, burning by the fever of Sri Krishna’s intense separation, Radharani becomes completely unaware of Her surroundings; if anyone tries to address Her, the words do not even enter Her ear, and She just lies there with Her dazed eyes completely motionless and blind.

Dhanistha then arrives, being sent by mother Yashoda from Nandagram, and sees this pitiful condition of Sri Radha. Becoming very sorry, Dhanistha says to Sri Lalita Devi,	

“Hey Lalite! Since Vrindavanesvari Sri Radharani didn’t come to Nandagram for cooking today, Sri Rohini had to cook this morning.  Sri Krishna ate those grains anyway and then went to the forest to tend His cows.  However, Sri Yashoda was so upset that He did not eat the food as it was usually cooked by Srimati Radharani on other days; thus, she sent me here  to see that Sri Radha makes some sweet balls, which I will then bring for Sri Krishna.  After helping Her to make the sweets, I will take them so that Sri Krishna can eat them tonight at dusk, in the later evening, and tomorrow morning before He goes to the pasture with the cows. But Sri Radhika has now fallen unconscious....alas!!  How will the sweet balls ever be made??  What should I do now??”

Lamenting in this way again and again, Dhanistha then goes close to Sri Radhika’s bedside. Seeing no other alternative, she bends down by Radharani’s ear and calls out in a loud voice, 
“Hey Radhe!!  Your Beloved Sri Krishna is now standing right in front of You!! Just open Your eyes and look!!"

Instantly upon hearing this, the lotus-petal-eyed Sri Radha suddenly regains consciousness, and Dhanistha quickly announces,  “Sri Radhe! Krishna is not able to eat properly unless He takes the food-grain's which are cooked by You; for this reason, Vrajesvari has sent me to You. Please make some sweet balls with Your own hand.”

The lotus-eyed Sri Radha, although burning horribly in the agonizing fire of separation, immediately becomes enthused with great energy upon hearing these words. 

Calling Sri Rupa Manjari close, She says, “Rupa Manjari! Quickly prepare the stove, light the fire and bring the cooking pot! Following the order of Vrajesvari, I will now prepare and send eatables for Sri Krishna. Hey Sakhi! Rather than the usual quantity of sweet balls that I make every day, today I will make four times that amount. Don’t you worry at all about my ill-health.”

Saying thus, Sri Radha spontaneously mounts a divine platform just in front of the stove. 

A most astonishing phenomena is... this very same Radharani.....by the touch of Whose body the cooling lotus-leaf bed began smoldering just a few minutes before....now felt that She was being cooled off by the red-hot fire used to cook sweets for Her Beloved.

Within the loftiest type of prema, an inconceivable power of amazing wonder is present; it is wonderful because one is burned by cooling camphor, and one is cooled by scorching fire! Consequently, is it possible at any time for anyone to understand such prema? What to speak of understanding the activities of a person who is surrendered to such prema?

Then, Sri Lalita says to Dhanistha, “Hey Dhanistha! Will profuse rain fall from the cloud combined with lightning? namely will there be no more arising of the fresh. new Krishna-raincloud inlaid with the creeper of Radha-lightning? The intense drought due to lack of rasa being sprinkled by these cloud is causing the crop of the sakhis’ bliss to whither and dry up into complete ruination!!!	

Dhanistha replies, “Lalite! You have spoken so true, so true----just as we are all miserable, in the same way Sri Krishna and all His cowherd boyfriends feel completely lost. What more can I say than this?-----even all of Sri Vrindavana’s parrots, peacocks, bees and deer have become greatly troubled by this same agonizing misery. 

Later, after finishing the preparation of the sweets, Sri Radha entrusts them into the hands of Dhanistha.

Then Sri Radha whispers some secrets into the ears of Lalita and the other sakhis. Dhanistha takes the sweets and returns back home to Nandagram.

Later on, in the early evening time, Visakha suddenly rushes before Jatila and starts rolling and rolling upon the ground, loudly crying out while weeping false tears.  Seeing all this, Jatila is surprised and asks,  “Hey Visakhe!  Why are you crying?”

Visakha:  “Unseen by others, a snake has bitten Sri Radhika!”

Jatila:  “Where and how was She bitten?”

Visakha:  “The snake was hiding at the base of a plum tree in the garden!  Radharani saw the jewel on it’s hood glittering through the leaves, and She extended Her hand to take it----and the snake suddenly bit Her!”

Jatila  “ALAS!!!  ALAS!!!  Has a thunderbolt struck me on the head?!?!?”

Crying out like this again and again, Jatila rushes to Sri Radha’s quarters and beholds Her sprawled out on the ground, trembling and gasping for air.  Seeing this, Jatila begins to beat her own breast with both hands while crying and sobbing in a loud voice.

Then, calling Kutila, Jatila frantically tells her, “Daughter! Go quickly to the cowshed and bring your brother Abhimanyu! After sending him here, please go and fetch the snake-bite doctors! By the chanting of their mantras, my Daughter-in-law will be freed from the effects of the poison!”

After instructing Kutila thus, Jatila questions Srimati Radharani, “Dearest daughter-in-law! How do you feel now?”

Radharani replies, “Oh respected superior! By the fire  of the poison, My whole body feels as if I am burning alive. This is all I know. I am not able to say anything more. But, you should know that if any male doctor were to set his hand on as much as My toe, then I will give up My body that very instant. I am a chaste daughter; therefore My strict vow stands firm.”

Jatila then pleads, “Oh my daughter-in-law! Why do You speak so at a time like this? Under these circumstances, even virtuous persons would eat something which is ordinarily inedible, or touch something untouchable; for this reason, due to such an emergency as this, there is no fault with the mantra remedy. This is the judgement of the wise who know the sruti and smrti sastras.”

Sri Radha replies, “Then I will give up My life right now before your very eyes, just you watch, but I am not able to follow your order at all!”

Hearing this statement, the old woman Jatila becomes most perplexed with intense anxiety.  Just then one lady, a neighbor, advises Jatila, “Arya!  There is someone here in Vraja Who has chastised many powerful snakes in the past like Kaliya, Agha and others.  When all the cows had died from drinking the poisoned waters of the Yamuna at Kaliya- hrad, He enthused them all with new life again merely by His glance.  This is Sri Hari; just bring Him here.  Simply by His glance, He will release your Daughter-in-law from the deadly poison.” 
Hearing this suggestion, Sri Radha says, “He whose tortuous controversial association is far worse for Me than the snake-poison----if anyone were to bring this Krishna here to see Me, then that person is as good as My lifelong enemy.”

Jatila says, “Look, my daughter-in-Law!  Then I will take Kutila with me and quickly go the see Paurnamasi, she is very learned in powerful snake-mantras, tantra and agama sastras.  When Paurnamasi comes, then she will certainly make You well.  Other than this, there seems to be no other alternative.”

Visakha says, “Arya!  Good plan, so don’t delay any longer, go quickly to see Paurnamasi.  I will use a string to make a tourniquet above Radharani’s wound in order to check the spread of the snake-poison.  By this, the deadly effect will be postponed for about an hour and a half, but, after that the poison will rise to Her brain and the effect will become incurable.”

Then Jatila rushes towards Nandagram’s border to see Paurnamasi.  After offering obeisances to her, she informs Paurnamasi of everything that had taken place.  Then, Paurnamasi inquires of Gargi, the daughter of Garga Muni, “Hey Vatsa Gargi!  Did you learn snake mantras from your father?”

Gargi answers, “No, I haven’t learned them, but my little sister has.”

Paurnamasi inquires, “Where does she live, and what is her name?  Where can she be found now?”

Gargi replies, “She has come from her mother-in-law’s house in Kasi, and is now residing at her father’s house in Mathura.  From there, she has come to see me just yesterday.  Her name is VIDYAVALI, and she is in my house right now.”

Hearing this, the old woman Jatila becomes incredibly anxious and totally desperate within her heart; with a tear-soaked face, she exclaims to Gargi, “Oh Gargi!  I have fallen down at your feet!  Please, please come along with your little sister to my house and purchase both me and my son with the nectarean blessing of your causeless mercy!”

Paurnamasi then tells Gargi, “Gargi!  Please take Jatila and Kutila to your home; satisfying Vidyavali with your requests, bring her to Yavat and for certain she will make Radhika free from the deadly snake- poison.”

Just prior to all this, Gargi had already dressed up Sri Krishna in the disguise of a young girl, following the instructions of Dhanistha, and situated Him within her own house.  The whole scam being nicely pre- arranged, Gargi leads Jatila and Kutila home, and brings them before the disguised Nagara-raja Sri Krishna.  Gargi then addresses Him,
“Hey little sister!  Vidyavali!  You have certainly heard the name of Sri Vrisabhanu-nandini, the greatly famous girl Who is endowed with all good qualities within Vraja.  Today, She has undergone a great calamity----some jewel-decorated snake has bitten Her.  Right now the snake’s deadly poison is spread throughout Her body; for this reason, Her mother-in-law has now come to see you along with her daughter.  You should go at once to their house.”

Vidyavali says, “Hey Bhagini!  My dear older sister Gargi!  You are indeed very learned, yet you now speak just like an ignorant person.  Alas, alas!!!  First of all, I am a pure chaste girl; secondly, being the daughter of a vipra, I have become a doctor specializing in treatment of poisons.  No one on the surface of the earth is unaware of my glorious family lineage in Yadupura Mathura, or my famous in-laws’ family lineage in Kasi.  Still, you want to throw the mud of such scandalous, unchaste infamy all over my two pure dynasties.  Whatever kind of loving action it is that you think you are doing----I am not able to understand that at all.”

Old Jatila says, “Hey Gunavati!  You Who are endowed with all good qualities!  I have fallen down at your two lotus feet!  Reviving my daughter-in-law Radhika, just purchase me wholesale with the dust of your feet----what more can I say?”

Vidyavali says, “Oh old lady of Vraja!  You are not aware of the elevated rules of conduct practiced by our pure brahmana family.  The learned, chaste daughters of the vipra caste never ever wander from house to house like the simple cowherd girls do.  Don’t you know this already?  By going to anyone and everyone’s house, the superior aristocracy of the vipra daughters is completely destroyed.”

Gargi says, “Sister Vidyavali!  Although you are aware of all the prescriptions and prohibitions of the sruti and smrti sastras, how do you manifest your so-called aristocracy by disrespecting the great souls who are residents of Vraja?  This shows that you actually don’t have any spiritual vision at all.  You have no idea of the spiritual position, the divine nobility or the Visnu-bhakti of the Vrajabasis.  All the gopis are each endowed with glorious achievements of great renown, and the gopas are each as effulgently brilliant as Maharaja Vrisabhanu.  The brahmanas of Kasi are all averse to Lord Visnu; I know all about your husband’s relatives there.  By living there in Kasi and associating with such atheistic relatives, you have really become so hard-hearted.”

Vidyavali replies, “Oh most noble, educated sister!  I am always surrendered to you; please don’t be angry with me.  Be peaceful.  I will certainly do as you say, but I have just one terrible fear----and for this reason, I was at first unable to appreciate your request of me.  When we were living in Mathura or Kasi, we have heard so many rumors of the bold, powerful son of Nanda, Who wanders about freely according to His own fanciful whims.  He is an extremely perverted debaucher, and He has no fear of the brahmana caste at all. If I am traveling on the footpath and He looks at me the same way He looks at all the Vraja-gopis, with that greedy, wanton stare, then I will instantly give up my life----I will never ever bring such a scandalous disgrace upon my two pure dynasties.”

Gargi assures her, “Hey little sister!  You don’t have to worry about this at all----I am personally going along just to accompany you.”

At that, Vidyavali finally consents to go, and leaves the house in the company of the others to walk on the path towards Yavat.

On the way, Vidyavali says to Jatila, “Hey Jarati!  Old lady!  Poison is destroyed by mantra and medicine combined.  The mantra is in my throat, and the medicine I will administer is simply my chewed betel leaves which have been sanctified by the mantra.  Hey Arya!  Do you think your daughter-in-law will be able to chew that?”

Jatila replies, “My daughter-in-law is very well-behaved, and She has natural devotion for the brahmana caste----but it seems rather strange that She should have to chew the remnants of your betel-leaf.”

Gargi cuts in,	“When it comes to medicine, there is no consideration for that which is fit or unfit for eating----even a king would honor the remnants of the brahmana caste.  Therefore, the vaisyas and other castes certainly follow suite.”

Arriving at Yavat, the Vidyavali-disguised Sri Krishna enters into the palace.  Jatila and her daughter Kutila then wash the feet of Vidyavali.  Taking that water, they sprinkle it over Sri  Radhika’s head, eyes, mouth and breast, saying, “Hey Daughter-in-law!  By great fortune, the daughter of Garga has just arrived.  She is a great soul, and is very learned in the science of snakes. She will touch all of Your limbs while chanting mantras, thereby freeing You from the disease caused by the snake-poison.  She will also chant a mantra and chew on betel leaves, which she will then place into Your mouth.  For my sake, please don’t object to any of these treatments.”

Saying this to Radharani, the old Jatila then takes Vidyavali within the room.  Vidyavali, seeing Sri Radhika’s body completely covered by Her sari, tells Jatila, “Hey old lady!  Your daughter-in-law is covered from head to toe with cloth----before treatment, you will have to open all that up.  Chanting my snake-mantra, I will move my hands slowly from the soles of Her feet right on up Her body.  Thus, whichever part of Her body has the poison, I will trace by the placement of my hands; then I will chant the mantra in order to free each limb from the poison.”

Hearing this, Jatila and Kutila remove the cloth that was covering Sri Radha’s body.  Then Vidyavali begins to chant the mantra and apply her hands to Sri Radha’s various limbs.  Vidyavali’s hands move upwards gradually from the divine lotus feet of Radharani to Her breasts----and somehow or other can not go any higher.  

Saying, “The poison has risen to Her breast”, Vidyavali repeatedly chants the Garuda mantras more intensely and begins to massage Sri Radhika’s breasts.  

Then Vidyavali exclaims to Jatila, “Hey old lady!  What has happened?  There seems to be no way I can check to spread of the poison!  What should I do now?” 
Old Jatila replies, “Oh Vidyavali!  Feed Her that medicine that you told us about----then the poison will surely be reduced!”

Vidyavali says, “Hey old lady!  Again and again I chant the mantra and sprinkle the medicine into your daughter-in-law’s mouth, but She still simply turns colors and trembles while exhaling very heavy sighs; this shows that the treatment didn’t work at all.  Under these circumstances, I’ll have to try another type of treatment.  Now all of you immediately go out of the room; locking the door from the inside, I will chant a special snake-mantra.  Within three hours, that very snake which bit your Daughter-in-law will be brought here, and I will indeed speak with him.  Hey old lady!  Don’t you worry at all, I am doing all this just to revive your daughter-in-law-----I will now chant the mantra with absolutely fixed attention, and  I’ll show you that everything will be all right within three hours’ time.”

Thereafter, upon Gargi’s confirmation, everyone leaves and goes to another part of the house, as Vidyavali had requested.  Three hours later, they return and wait outside the door of Sri Radhika’s bedroom.  Then all those gopis say to each other, “Oh!  Just listen to the conversation between Vidyavali and the snake taking place within Radharani’s room!”

Kala-nidhi Sri Krishna, the abode of all artistic abilities, thus made His voice imitate the sound of both Vidyavali and the snake.  All of Sri Radhika’s sakhis, knowing full well of this mischievous fun, simultaneously became deeply immersed in the ocean of curious novel pranks as well as in the ocean of ecstatic bliss.  Thus, their faces all began to radiate a divine, jubilant luster.

Sri Krishna, first of all making the voice of Vidyavali, spoke to the snake, “Hey King of the snakes!  From where have you come?”

Snake:  “From Kailasa.”

Vidyavali:  “Under whose direction?”

Snake:  I am carrying out the order of he who wears a crescent-moon on his head (Shiva).”

Vidyavali:  “What is his order?”

Snake:  “To bite the son of Jatila, Abhimanyu.”

Vidyavali:  “What is the offense committed by Abhimanyu?”

Snake:  “Nothing at all, but his mother Jatila has committed two grave offenses unto Durvasa, the best of the munis.”

Vidyavali:  “Then why didn’t you bite the mother of Abhimanyu?”

Snake:  “I didn’t bite her, for by biting her son instead, I would be able to burn her with extremely miserable suffering and lamentation on account of the loss of her only son----this would be even greater burning than the poison itself.”

Vidyavali:  “Leaving Abhimanyu, why have you bitten his wife, Radharani?”

Snake:  “By the power and influence of the boon of chastity given to the supremely pure Radharani by Durvasa Muni, Her husband Abhimanyu had become free from all obstacles.  Thus, by biting his dear wife, he would certainly die due to lack of life; this is why I have bitten Her today----and tomorrow morning, I will bite Abhimanyu anyway.  In this way, Jatila will burn miserably in her old age, lamenting bitterly over the loss of her dear son and matchless daughter-in-law; this is my purpose.”

Vidyavali:  “Hey King of the snakes!  What were the two offenses committed by Jatila unto Durvasa, the best of the munis?”

Snake:  “Durvasa was born as a plenary portion of Lord Shiva.  And Lord Shiva considers Lord Hari to be his own worshipful Lord or istha-deva.  Lord Hari’s plenary portion is Sri Nanda-nandana, against Whom Jatila spoke some false, scandalous blasphemy.  This was the first offense.  The second offense is that Jatila confined Srimati Radharani indoors, thus placing a deliberate obstacle in the way of Sri Krishna’s taking of regular meals.  Due to these two grave offenses, may Jatila perpetually cry miserably here in Vraja along with her daughter Kutila over the loss of her dear son Abhimanyu and her daughter-in-law Sri Radhika.”

Hearing all this from outside the door, the old Jatila bursts out in grievous weeping and begins to speak while sobbing and sobbing, “Oh my son!  Oh my daughter-in-law, the source of my very breath!  May you both live long lives!  How can I hear of anything other than this?”

Saying this again and again, Jatila then addresses Vidyavali,  “Hey Vidyavali!  I hold onto your feet!  Please, please pacify the King of the snakes somehow or other!  I promise that I will never, ever place any more obstacles before Sri Radhika!  I will personally see to it that She goes to Nandagram every day just to cook for Sri Krishna’s meals!  And when She returns home after finishing Her cooking, then I will bow down and offer Durvasa Muni hundreds and hundreds of obeisances while praying, “Oh best of the sages! Please forgive my offense! On one side, my intelligence has become dull due to becoming senile in my old age, and on the other side, I am known to be quite crazy anyway; therefore, please don’t take my offense seriously! As for my daughter Kutila, she is really dull-brained and foolish - she continuously causes trouble and pain for my well-behaved daughter-in- law for no good reason at all.”

Hearing the statement of her mother, Kutila then falls on the ground, offering obeisances unto the snake while loudly exclaiming, “Oh King of the snakes! Please forgive us! Please be merciful! Please don’t bite my brother! I will never ever hinder Sri Radhika! I will never ever argue with Her, and from now on, I will allow Her and Her girlfriends to go anywhere and everywhere they like!”

Snake: “Oh assembled witnesses! Listen carefully to what I say--I swear by Lord Shiva that Srimati Radharani is supremely pure and chaste.”

Then, he says to Jatila,  “Hey old woman Jatila!  Just as I’ve sworn by Shambhu to attest for the chastity of Sri Radha, in the same way I want you to swear upon the head of your son Abhimanyu and say, ‘NOW I HAVE COMPLETE, ABSOLUTE FAITH IN SRI RADHIKA'-------then I will know that you have true conviction for my words.”

Hearing this, Jatila takes the oath and says,  “Oh King of the snakes!  I am absolutely convinced of all that you say!  I will never, never ever disturb my daughter-in-law again.  Please bestow this one benediction on me----that my son and daughter- in-law may live a long life.”

Snake:  “Oh Jatila!  Now I have really become fully pleased with you!  Just worship Durvasa, the best of the munis, and prepare nice eatables.  I will now remove all the poison from Radharani’s body and go back to Kailasa.  Hey old woman!  If you ever charge your daughter-in- law with any kind of false accusation again in relation to Sri Krishna and try to confine Her as you have today, then I won’t be angry with you at all-----I will simply come immediately and angrily bite both Radhika and Abhimanyu, completely destroying them simultaneously.”

Vidyavali then happily calls out to all the gopis in the next room, “Bho, bho gopikas!  May all of you now achieve the topmost bliss----the King of the snakes has removed the poison from Sri Radha’s body and has disappeared; thus VRSABHANU-NANDINI IS NOW CURED!!!”

After announcing the good news, Vidyavali unlocks the door.  Everyone then enters and begins to ask, “Oh Radhe!  How do You fell now?”

Sri Radha Replies, “Now I feel perfectly healthy; not even a trace of pain is left.”

After hearing this, everyone present bows down at Vidyavali’s feet and begins to pray,
“Hey Vidyavali!  Your knowledge is glorious!  And your wonderful achievement today is glorious!  By thus reviving Srimati Radharani, you have certainly obtained vast pious credits, whereby your own life has become really glorious!”

After this, Kutila whispers quietly into the ear of her mother Jatila, “Oh mother! Give Vidyavali the necklace of Sri Radhika as a reward.”

Jatila replies, “Oh daughter! What are you saying? Why just Her necklace? Today, all of Sri Radhika’s ornaments should be given as a reward to Vidyavali.”

The old Jatila replies, “Dear Gargi! Dear Vidyavali! How is it that you are so hasty to return home this late at night? Oh, won’t you be pleased to rest happily tonight at my house?”

Gargi says, “Oh Jatila! We will certainly honor your words by accepting your invitation. The thought of fearful snakes and deadly poison is still fresh on our minds (in other words, although the poison from the fangs of the Krishna-snake has been warded off, there is still a chance of it coming back).  Therefore it is wise to stay close by the mantric doctor Vidyavali tonight.”

Kutila and Jatila together speak, “Very good----let it be so.  Hey Gargi!  Vidyavali is so learned in mantras----just let her rest happily tonight together with Sri Radhika upon Her own bed under the rooftop canopy”........

	                                  ittham vilasa-rasikau rata-sindhu caru-
     hillola-khelana-kalah kila tenatus tau
                                    	premabdhi-kautuka mahistha taranga-range
                                    	sadyah sukhena nanrtur na viramam apuh

“In this way, the Vilasa-rasika Radha-Krishna manifest so many expansive surging waves of beautiful artistic sports, which just billow over the ocean of pure, divine amorous love.  And all Their sakhis dance within the sporting arena represented by the waves of supremely mischievous, novel pranks and fun curiosities that similarly billow over the ocean of selfless prema; indeed, there is no cessation of that dancing and dancing........

THUS ENDS THE THIRD PRANK OF SRI CAMATKARA CANDRIKA, ENTITLED VAIDYA VESE MILANA

 (Meeting in the Disguise of a Female Doctor)

FOURTH PRANK : GAYIKA VESE MILANA 

(Meeting in the Disguise of a Female Singer)

  One day, Sri Radhika is pouting in such a greatly proud mood that Sri Hari could do nothing at all to pacify Her.  Indeed, He tried many different methods, but no remedy was able to satisfy Her unfavorable huff.

Finally, He consults with Kunda-lata, His sister-in-law.  Together, they dress Him up with the clothing and ornaments of a beautiful young girl.  Then He chit-chats with Kunda-lata in the sweetest feminine voice which puts to shame that of a cuckoo, and gradually approaches the home of Jatila.  While walking along the secluded path, the universe-enchanting anklets adorning His divine lotus feet begin to vibrate.  When the smiling, deer-eyed Sri Vrisabhanu-nandini spots from afar such an uncommonly attractive, beautiful young girl accompanying Kunda-lata, then Her mind becomes most mystified and charmed with fascination.  When all of the other sakhis behold the rarely seen, super excellent astonishing beauty of the girl, they also become stunned with sheer amazement.

Srimati Radharani then speaks very jubilantly to Kunda-lata, 
“Hey Kunda-lata!  Come, come----tell Me why have you suddenly arrived at this unusual time of the evening?  And who is your companion, this beautiful young girl?  Where has she come from?  And what is her name?  Kindly tell Me everything.”

Kunda-lata:  “Hey Radhe!  Her name is KALAVALI, the artful maiden.  She heard all about Your divine holy name, Your divine qualities and Your glorious fame, and she has now come from Mathura just to have Your darshan.  Her singing and musical abilities are so highly developed that she can conquer even the celestial songs of Brihaspati.  What more can I say?  You should now hear her sing Yourself, and thus become a witness of her incredible artistry.”

Sri Radha: “From whom has she learned such knowledge of singing?”

Kunda-lata: “She has learned singing from Brihaspati, the guru of Indra, the King of the Demigods.”

Sri Radha: “How was it that she had the chance to meet him?”

Kunda-lata: “Once, Brihaspati came down from the heavenly planets to attend the sacrificial assembly of Angirasa Muni and other brahmanas in Mathura. At that time, he stayed in Mathura for one month, being received and honored with great respect by all the citizens. During that stay, he once sang a celestial song in the midst of the sacrificial assembly. My dear friend Radhe! This most intelligent girl heard that difficult song and instantly memorized it. The next day, she sang that very same celestial song in a solitary place, exactly duplicating it note for note. The guru of the immortals, Brihaspati, heard her repeating that song and became most astonished. He addressed a Mathura brahmana, ‘My dear brahmana! Who is that girl that is singing my song? Although she is a resident of the mortal world, she heard a very difficult celestial song once from my mouth and instantly memorized it - please bring her before me immediately!”

“Following the order of Brihaspati, the brahmana went and brought her before him. Then Brihaspati said to her, “Oh most intelligent girl! You have matchless intelligence, and your voice conquers the sweetness of the cuckoo’s! Therefore, I will instruct you in the celestial musical science of Gandharva-vidya. Aho! My goodness! A voice and intelligence such as yours is never found amongst human beings, nor even amongst the Kinnara women of the heavenly planets.”

“Oh Radhe! Brihaspati thus instructed this girl in the classical arts of music during the period of his stay for one month in Mathura. Thereafter, when the time came for his return back to the heavenly planets, he took her along to the world of the celestials and then gave her more instructions in Gandharva-vidya for a whole year. She has returned to Mathura on the surface of the earth just yesterday, and she has come here to Vraja just now at dusk. So here she is right before Your very eyes; now You may examine her abilities and good qualities.”

Sri Radha: “My dear Kalavali! Please sing us a little song!”

Kalavali: “Vrindavanesvari! Which raga shall I sing?”

Sri Radha: “Malava raga is proper to be sung at this time of the evening.”

Kalavali: “Oh lovely-faced one! Which key and pitch shall I sing in? Please order me.”

Sri Radha: “It’s not possible to sing the intervals between the notes due to the natural defects of the throat. It’s only possible to sing the finer in-between notes purely when the singing is accompanied by the vina. Therefore sing and use the musical embellishments of tune, range, ornament, tone, melody, rhythm and lyric. Kindly sing a sweet song.”

Kalavali: “Oh Radhe! Who in this entire universe knows singing other than Yourself?  Anyway, I will try to sing a simple, unprepared song.  Please listen.

Saying this, Kalavali then begins to sing “TA-NA-NA-NA-TA-NA-NA” in a beautiful voice which simply puts to shame the sweet notes of the peacocks and bees.  When all of Radharani’s priya-sakhis hear Kalavali’s song and technique of vocal embellishment, then torrents of tears begin to gush from their eyes just like so many flowing rivers; indeed, their teardrops become just like large pebbles and begin dropping onto the ground, making the sound ‘THANAT THANAT’.......

As far as Sri Radhika’s reaction, the sparkling diamond of Her heart, which had become extremely hard due to the presence of Her proud pouting huff against Sri Krishna, immediately begins to soften and melt.  Feeling this change of heart, Sri Radha becomes very astonished in great surprise as She exclaims, “Ayi Kalavali!!!  Your fascinating song simply belittles the nectar of the gods!  Hey Kalavali!  I have become completely enchanted by your unique qualities!  I now cherish a great desire within My mind----- I fancy that a girl as talented as you should always live by My side!  By that, then only will My birth become successful.  Oh most qualified Kalavali!  Only Sri Nanda-nandana is capable of understanding the glories of your talent.  Hey sakhi!  If He were to hear your singing, then He would indeed wear you around His neck, accepting you to be a permanent necklace!”

Kunda-lata then says, “Hey Radhe!  Please refrain from speaking such unbefitting words to the supremely chaste Kalavali; if You really do have genuine love and affection for her, then just accept her around Your own neck.  Don’t consider anything else.”

After this Srimati Radharani, still mystified and enchanted with Kalavali’s singing and heavenly beauty, gets ready to offer a jewelled locket worth 100,000 million gold pieces to Kalavali.  Just as She is about to wrap Her arms around Kalavali’s neck in order to fasten the locket, Sri Lalita quickly whispers into Her ear, “Hey Radhe!  Who are You just about to embrace?  This is Your wicked Lover----the Rogue has come in the disguise of a woman.”

Sri Radha replies, “Hey sakhi Lalite!  Oh smooth-complexioned one!  You have certainly spoken the truth after thoughtful consideration.  But it is not really befitting for Me to offer her simply one small locket; therefore she will be given all of My ornaments.”

Saying this, Sri Radhika then addresses Sri Rupa Manjari, “Hey Rupa Manjari!  In My presence, kindly dress this girl up with great care and attention with exotic valuable cloth.  Removing her old corset, please cover her raised breasts with a fresh new one."

Kunda-lata then says, “Hey Sumukhi!  Lovely-faced Radharani!  It is not befitting to undress this young girl right here, in front of everyone.  She has come from a foreign land, and she will naturally feel very shy and embarrassed.  Whatever gifts You want to give to her, just place them in her hands; then, after she returns to her home, she can put it on without feeling shy.  But under no circumstances is it possible for her to dress up here.”

Radharani says, “Sakhi Kalavali!  Women are never shy or fearful within an assembly of other women; this is indeed well-known throughout all the lands.  Oh sakhi!  My dear friend!  Not following the easy path of blissful happiness, why are you deliberately placing the thorn-like obstacle of shy hesitation in the way?”

Kalavali says, “Hey Radhe!  I will not accept a single necklace, cloth or ornament from You.  Hey simple, innocent girl!  Am I not the daughter of a well-to-do singer?  If You really are pleased with me, then just step close and give me a warm hug, and I will be satisfied with that.  I tell You truly that other than a loving embrace, I have no hankering at all for any type of riches.”

Sri Radhika says, “Hey sakhi!  My dear friend!  Why are you being so difficult?  Just put on these clothes and ornaments nicely, without any complaint.  If you are not pleased to do so, then we will forcibly help you to put them on.  You are a single girl, and we are many sakhis; thus you are totally outnumbered, helpless and incapable of maintaining any opposition to our desire.  Just keep this in mind, oh simple innocent girl!’

 Saying this, Srimati Radharani then orders Her girlfriends, “Hey assembly of sakhis!  In the presence of everyone, help this young girl to change her bodice.”

Hearing this order, two sakhis immediately step forward and untie the back and shoulder-knots that held on the bodice worn by the Kalavali- disguised Krishna.  The very second it is loosened, two very large kadamba flowers suddenly pop out and fall from Krishna’s chest onto the floor.

Radharani asks, “Hey dasis!  What was it that fell down from her bodice?”

Sri Rupa Manjari and all the other dasis simply clap their hands and begin to giggle and laugh in reply.  It was obvious to everyone that Sri Krishna was holding the two large kadamba flowers on His chest as false breasts, yet as soon as those flowers fell onto the floor, He pretends to act just like an embarrassed girl and shyly covers His moonlike face with His veil.  Due to the sheer buffoonery displayed by this outrageously mischievous prank of their Nagara, everyone present tries to cover their faces with their veils in order to check the big smiles that arose; but still, no one is able to prevent the forceful exclamations of loud laughing and giggling that results.

Sri Radhika then turns Her back on Krishna and staggers over to Her asana.  All the sakhis, seeing this ridiculous condition of Sri Krishna, also turn their backs while laughing and laughing.  Sri Radha begins to laugh even louder, while trying harder and harder to keep from making any sound.  Then Sri Krishna and Kunda-lata also begin cracking up in hysterical laughter.  Thus, within that very room, the hasya- rasa, or the transcendental mellow of the most comical joking mood, becomes obviously present in personified form, and verily attains the post as the most luscious object of taste for about 3 hours continuously.

Thereafter, the sakhis begin to speak jokingly, addressing the two kadamba flowers, 
“Hey pair of big kadamba flowers!  On the surface of this earth, you two are so fortunate!  This is because in spite of your natural tendency to be freed from any kind of cheating propensity, you have somehow taken shelter of this Rascal Cheater, and you have thus been employed as accomplices in this bogus fraud.  You are just innocent flowers of a tree-----you know absolutely nothing of cunning, shrewd behavior.  Yet this Rascal has kept you on His chest and thus made you look just like the breasts of a young woman, thereby manifesting His own shameless impertinence.  And the only result from all this curious mischief is that by showing us your true innocence in this way, you have thus caused all of us to become deeply immersed and drowned within the nectarean ocean of hasya-rasa!!!”

Then the sakhis say to Kunda-lata, “Hey Kunda-lata!  Where has your girlfriend named ‘bashfulness’ gone now?”

Kunda-lata:  “It has fallen down in the water which lies beneath the Patala-loka planet, becoming drowned along with Kunda-lata, never to be seen again.”

Lalita:  “If Kunda-lata has been drowned and has died along with her own girlfriend named ‘bashfulness’, then who are you?”

Kunda-lata:  “Oh, I’m just her shadow.”

Lalita:  “Kunda-lata!  If you have departed, then how is it that I am now seeing your shadow?”

Kunda-lata:  “I have no power to answer this question; may the Goddess of Speech again and again dance appropriately on all of your tongues.”

Lalita:  “Hey Kunda-lata!  Your tongue has never had any connection with false statements due to your having the good loving association of Brihaspati’s disciple Kalavali since your very childhood.  By instructing chaste girls in your own righteous activities, you thus perform great noble deeds (on behalf of Cupid’s interest).  This munificent glory of yours is indeed fulfilled today, but instead an agonizing pain and frustration has become evident.  Oh most intelligent sakhi Kunda-lata!  Today you have proudly come from afar to enter the marketplace of our assembly of sakhis just to sell the knowledge you’ve invented by many different techniques and earned from your Sri Guru, but alas!  Alas!  You were not able to sell your knowledge in this marketplace at all, but instead you have somehow become the butt of jokes and laughter!  Aho!----you certainly must have left home today at an inauspicious moment!”

Sri Krishna suddenly cuts in, “Hey Lalite!  If I’m able to fulfill my desire of selling my knowledge in this marketplace, then you have to give me your bodice; if not, then I will give you mine-----this is my wager.”

Lalita:  “Can dried-up flowers ever bud into fresh sprouts?  When the life has left someone’s body, can any endeavor on the part of others bring it back again?  Will anyone continue to worship a proud and arrogant person even after the real truth about his nature is exposed?”

“Hey Svamin!  There’s absolutely no necessity of you displaying any more of your mischievous tricks of mind-boggling ingenuity; now you are free to go.”

At this, Sri Krishna picks up the two kadamba flowers from the floor and leaves.  Replacing the flowers on his chest as false breasts again, he then goes into Jatila’s quarters.  Coming before Jatila, he begins rolling on the ground and cries out loudly, lamenting piteously in a very mournful voice.  Seeing all this, Jatila becomes very touched with sorrow; coming forward,She asks,  “Hey Putri!  Who are you?  Why are you crying?  From where have you come?  What terrible thing has happened?  Please wipe the tears from your sad face and tell me everything.”

Kalavali:  “Oh Arya!  ALAS!!  ALAS!!! What should I do now???  I am not able to tell you of the misery, the agony!  Oh, I am so unfortunate!  Curses on my birth!  To hell with my body!  Hundreds and hundreds of curses on my very life!!!”

Exclaiming all this, Kalavali then simply lies there on the ground before old Jatila and begins to shiver and tremble.  Then, with half- broken syllables she speaks faintly, “Oh Arya!  I live in the town of King Vrisabhanu at Barsana, and I am the daughter of Kirtida’s sister.  Kirtida is the mother of Srimati Radharani; therefore I am the girl-cousin of Radharani by birth.  Thus, since my very childhood, I have had a very close, loving relationship with Sri Radha.  And now, I have become very anxious due to our being separated for many days.  This is why I have come from my home in Barsana today to see Radharani here in Yavat.  But woe is me!  Radharani wouldn’t even cast Her glance in my direction when I came before Her!  She would not speak to me at all, nor embrace me, nor ask about my well-being, nor smile at me----ALAS!!!  If this Radharani, Who is my one and only dearest girlfriend since birth, shows this type of cold-hearted negligence towards me, then I really don’t see any necessity of maintaining my useless life any more!  Oh Arya!  I am now giving up my life right before your very eyes!  Oh Arya!  Please, please think it over carefully and try to determine if I had ever committed some offense in order to make Sri Radhika behave with me in such a way!  Please make Her swear the truth and tell why She is so angry with me for no reason at all!”

Jatila’s heart immediately becomes softened and melts just to hear such pitiful exclamations and sorrowful lamentations of Kalavali.  The old woman feels very sad and speaks sweetly,

“Hey Vatse!  Don’t you worry about anything at all!  Please feel reassured that everything will be all right!  Just by seeing you, I think that there is certainly no offense at all on your part.  I am going this instant to set this matter straight.  I promise you that I’ll do whatever it takes to make Radharani show Her love and affection for you again; indeed, I will quickly make Her embrace you, I will make Her speak to you, and I will see to it that both of you sleep together on the same bed tonight!”

Saying this, Jatila takes Kalavali along and goes quickly to the palatial quarters of her daughter-in-law Radhika.  Seeing all the sakhis present before her, Jatila begins to admonish them in a slightly raised voice, “Lalite!  What kind of disgustingly rude behavior has my daughter-in- law been engaged in just now?  Her girl-cousin has just come from Her father’s village with great eagerness to see Her----and She has not even spoken a word to show Her loving affection!  Tell me----why are such things going on around here?”

Then, addressing Radharani, Jatila begins to rebuke,  “Hey Radharani!  Just see how this poor young girl’s dress is completely soaked with her own tears!  When I saw that, my heart became most disturbed.  And when I saw the sad look on her face, then my heart became completely overwhelmed with great compassion.  Oh Sucarita!  She Whose character is supposed to be flawless!  Oh Sad-guna- purna!  She Who is supposed to be full of all good qualities!  Oh my daughter-in-law!  Please be merciful to this girl and give her a warm, tight hug!  Ask of her well-being, have a little talk together, and thereby mitigate the sorrowful anguish of her heart.  Behave lovingly towards her as before and thus make her blissful; do all this right now for my satisfaction.”

Sri Radha replies, “Hey Arya!  You can just return to your quarters now----don’t worry, I will do everything just as you have ordered Me.  It is getting late.  Now you can happily take rest if you like.  There’s no need of you bothering yourself with the petty quarrels of little girls like us.  Little girls are all alike----they are very small in age and similarly small in intelligence.  From moment-to- moment they fluctuate between joyful playing and fighting.  Therefore it is not befitting for a mature adult such as yourself to come here and get involved in the childish affairs of such young girls as us.”

Jatila says strongly, “Hey daughter-in-law!  Stand up right now!  Don’t You dare say anything more!  I gave my word to this girl!  Now You step forward and embrace Your girl-cousin right now!  Then You should eat Your evening meal together and then sleep together on the same bed!  I am Your superior, so You are in no position to transgress my order!”

Sri Radha replies, “Hey Arya!  I know that you are very enthusiastic to instruct Me properly, but just listen to one thing-----I assure you that I am telling the truth.  This young girl has spoken some very harsh words to Kunda-lata; for this reason, I have become very angry, and I will not even look upon her face.  However, if she now makes up with Kunda-lata and becomes pleased once again, then only will I become pleased with her.  Thus, only under these circumstances will I carry out the instructions you have given Me.”

Kunda-lata objects, “Hey Arya!  Your daughter-in-law is telling lies----Kalavali never spoke any harsh words to me!  Therefore I am not angry with her at all!”

Sri Radha clearly says, “Kunda-lata! Why do you fib right in front of our superior, Jatila?  If you are actually not angry, and are indeed pleased with Kalavali, then just embrace her right now in front of all of us.”

Hearing this, Kunda-lata remains silent.  Then the deer-eyed Radharani speaks with very clever genius, “Hey Arya!  You think it over and then decide-----between Kunda-lata and I, just see who is telling a lie.  Then you can chastise whoever is at fault.  Why is it that these two won’t embrace one another?  Look at the obvious facts----if Kunda-lata cannot tolerate to embrace this young girl Kalavali, then that is a sure sign of her anger.  This can be the only reason-----there is no doubt about it.”

Jatila says, “My daughter-in-law certainly speaks the truth!  Kunda- lata obviously shows her displeasure by not forgiving Kalavali.  Oh!  Kunda-lata!  Girl of cultured behavior!  I will certainly do whatever is required to make you pleased with Kalavali.  Although I am your worshipable superior, still I beg you with folded hands----please come forward right now and, looking me in the face, just embrace this girl Kalavali.  There’s no need for any further words in this matter at all.  Alas!  Alas!  I swear upon my head!”

Hearing this statement, Kunda-lata still remains silent and motionless.  Seeing this, Lalita and all the other sakhis begin to prod her,  “Hey Kunda-lata!  Arya has given her oath!  Don’t you have any fear or respect for that?  How does this show your real intelligence?  Come on, come on-----Embrace Kalavali!”

Saying this, all the sakhis plus Jatila and Kutila together combine together and forcibly make Sri Krishna and Kunda-lata embrace.

At that time, all the sakhis feel an unending explosion of the hasya- rasa within their consciousness.  Just as if old Jatila was not present, they all begin to laugh and laugh uncontrollably.  Trying hard to keep from making any sound, they all cover their faces with their veils; but still, they all bend forward and stoop down again and again, becoming absolutely doubled-up in the greatest maha-bliss.

Afterwards, Jatila addresses her own daughter-in-law,  ''Hey Sri Radhika!  Now You may speak loving words and converse with Your own cousin----just embrace her without any fuss.

Saying this, Jatila suddenly grasps both Sri Krishna’s and Sri Radha’s hands and quickly brings Them together, locking Them together in a deep, magnificent embrace.  Immediately upon this, Sri Sri Radha- Krishna’s tears of pure ecstatic bliss begin to flow profusely, drip dripping onto the ground.

Seeing this, Jatila says, “Hey two cousins!  So many tears are flowing due to Your mutual embrace----just use the corners of Your cloth to wipe away each others’ face.  Now You can simply make each other happy.  Take some nice food together, and then You may pass the night lovingly on the same bed.  I am going now to take rest myself.”

Saying this, the old woman Jatila leaves for her own quarters to retire for the night.  As soon as she leaves, Sri Krishna addresses all the sakhis with the greatest proud arrogance,

“Bho, bho sakhis!  Now the knowledge I’ve brought has become most condemned!  By finally selling it, I have now obtained the perfect fulfillment of all My desires!  Namely, all of you have now been conquered by Me!”

Lalita replies, “Hey Rasika-nagara!  You truly, truly have attained Your desire by enjoying Your own sister-in-law Kunda-lata; thus You have indeed won the greatest victory in the end after all.  And after You have thus made a mockery of the rules of decent social behavior, I now give You full encouragement----whatever unfulfilled desire that is still leftover in the mind of the half-enjoyed Kunda-lata, then I beg You to kindly make that complete!”

Kunda-lata angrily says, “Hey Lalite!  Do you think that a pure minded brother cannot embrace his own sister?  Or that a pure-minded father cannot embrace his own daughter?  You are all obviously pierced from head to toe by the arrows of Cupid, and you are thus engrossed in such amorous pangs!  For that reason, you see everyone else in the world to be just like yourselves!!!”

Saying this in great rage, Kunda-lata then storms out of the room in great haste.  Seeing this, each and every sakhi also rushes out to try and pacify her.  This leaves the young Couple Sri Sri Radha-Krishna alone and unprotected in the room; indeed, only the Flower Archer remained just to give exclusive protection to Yugala-Kisora........

	                                   sa-bhru-vibhanga kutilasya saroja-sidhu
                                     	     madyan madhu-vrata-vilasa-susaurabhani
	                                  samprapya jala-vivaresu jughurnur eva
          	                                          presthalayah prati-padam pramadormi-punjai
9

“Thus all the dear sakhis situated outside catch a whiff of the fragrance of divine sports produced by the mad Madhusudana-honeybee as He wildly drinks the nectarine lotus face of the crooked eyebrow-decorated Radharani------fixing their eyes by the holes of the latticed window, all of those sakhis are dashed to and fro while floating over the repeatedly billowing ocean-waves of sheer blissful insanity....while their consciousness reels excitedly from every moment-to-moment..........

THUS ENDS THE FOURTH PRANK OF SRI CAMATKARA CANDRIKA

 ENTITLED GAYIKA VESE MILANA 

(The Meeting in the Disguise of a Female Singer) 

THE END OF SRI SRI CAMATKARA CANDRIKA 

(A Moonbeam of Sheer Astonishment)

 by Srila Visvanatha Cakravarti Thakura